A. The key word in this question is “job.” Your job is that of the babysitter. The real parent is the one who created the children. The child should learn from your actions and the way you live. Words are of no value. For example, if you show stress, anger, or fear, the child may pick up those qualities. On the other hand, if you are a non-smoker, live within your means, are punctual, organized, and the child does completely the opposite, you are free from the guilt. Your job is only till the child reaches the age of 13. (Legal age is 18, but you can only be tough on the children till they turn 13–then, they start thinking for themselves and will learn from their own experiences.) Then you get fired from this job. You are allowed to remain friends, but not a parent for life. If you were too hard on them, or too easy on them, the results will show up in time. Many times, the parents over-compensate with their children, based on the childhood they themselves had. Worrying about your children when they grow up serves no purpose. You had a chance when they were very young. In your heart, you know the truth. I have never heard a parent say they have not done a good job. If anything, see the magnification of your weaknesses that the child has picked up. Use that to motivate yourself to overcome them. — Satish Daryanani

Young girl walking with Mom and Dad